How Did I Get Here? Finding Your Way to Renewed Hope And Happiness When Life And Love Take Unexpected Turns

Chapter One Digging Deep for Wisdom It may be that when we no longer know what to do, we have come to our real work, and when we no longer know which way to go, we have begun our real journey. Wendell Berry We begin with a story: A man who always considered himself clever and capable died at the end of a long life and found himself on The Other Side, waiting for an interview with God. Time seemed to be nonexistent as he sat alone in a light-filled room with no ceiling, no walls and no floor, trying to adjust to his new circumstances and anxiously anticipating his upcoming meeting. "What will God ask me?" he wondered. "I was never much of a deep thinker. What if he asks me about the meaning of life? I won't know what to say. I could always tell the truthI was too busy being successful to think about that kind of thing. After all, my accomplishments have been very impressiveeven God should be able to see that!" With intense concentration, he tried to recall all of the marvelous things he had achieved during his lifetime, so he'd be ready to talk to God. Suddenly God appeared before him and sat down in the other empty chair. "It is good to see you," God began. "So tell me, how do you think you did?" The man breathed an enormous sigh of relief to hear that this was the question God was asking the one question he was sure he could answer. Feeling confident, he began: "Well, I thought you might ask that, so I've made a short list of my accomplishments. I wanted to own my own business and become financially successful, and I did that. I wanted to have a good marriage, and I stayed married until my wife passed awayfifty-two years! I wanted to put my two children through college, and I did that. I wanted to own a luxurious home, and I did that. I wanted to learn to play golf and break ninety, and I did that. I wanted to buy a boat, and I did that. Oh, I can't forget this oneI wanted to donate money to worthy causes on a regular basis, and I did that." The man felt quite satisfied with himself, hearing his own list. Surely God was going to be impressed. "So in conclusion," he declared, "I would say without wanting to sound immodest or anything, that I did very well, considering I accomplished most of the things I set out to do. But of course, since you're God, you knew all of this already." God smiled kindly at the man. "Actually, you're mistaken." "Mistaken?" the man asked. "I don't understand." "You're mistaken," God repeated, "Because I wasn't paying much attention to the goals you achieved." The man was taken aback. "You weren't? But I thought . . ." "I know," God interrupted. "Everyone thinks the better their life went, the more successful their life was. But it doesn't work that way up here. I didn't pay attention to all the times you got what you expected and hoped for, for that wouldn't teach me much about what you were learning in your earthly existence. I was watching you most closely during all those difficult times when you encountered the unexpected, the things you did not plan on or want to happen. You see, it is how you dealt with these that reflects the growth and wisdom of your soul." The man was stunned. He'd gotten it all wrong! He'd spent his whole lifDe Angelis, Barbara is the author of 'How Did I Get Here? Finding Your Way to Renewed Hope And Happiness When Life And Love Take Unexpected Turns', published 2006 under ISBN 9780312330163 and ISBN 0312330162.