Sacred Parenting How Raising Children Shapes Our Souls

Sacred Parenting Copyright © 2004 by Gary L. Thomas Requests for information should be addressed to: Zondervan, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Thomas, Gary (Gary Lee) Sacred parenting : how raising children shapes our souls / Gary L. Thomas- 1st ed. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references. ISBN 0-310-24734-9 1. Parenting-Religious aspects-Christianity 2. Parents-Religious life. I. title. BV4526.3.T46 2004 248.8'45-dc22 2003020213 This edition printed on acid-free paper. All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means-electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other-except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher. Interior design by Michelle Espinoza Printed in the United States of America 04 05 06 07 08 09 /. DC/ 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 "If it was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called labor". Anonymous "It is in families we are broken and it is in families that we are healed". Carl Whittaker "Dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God". 2 Corinthians 7:1 Papa God One day, when our daughter Kelsey was two years old, she started pointing at every family member's chair around the table. I was gone at the time. "Mommy," she began, "Allison, Graham, Kelsey . . ." She then pointed to my empty seat and said, "God." "That's not God, Kelsey," Lisa, my wife, said. "That's Papa." "Jesus," Kelsey replied with a smile. Three days later, all of us were together in a hotel room when Kelsey did it again. She started pointing to everybody and announcing his or her name. When she got to me, she said, "Jesus." "I'm not Jesus, Kelsey," I said. "I'm Papa." "You're Papa God," Kelsey replied. I was flabbergasted and earnestly tried to talk it out with her, but you parents know what a two-year-old is like. By the time I had made my point, Kelsey had found something vastly more interesting than theology-her little toe, and how it could be made to wiggle in all directions. To me, this is one of the greatest ironies of parenting. I think about how big I seemed to my kids when I was just in my twenties, and how little I knew. Now, a bit more experienced in my forties, it's almost laughable how much smaller I seem to my children! Graham knows he could take me in a math test (though as I write this, thankfully, he still hasn't beaten me in a round of golf), and there's no chance either one of my daughters would mistake me for deity. But these early episodes of mistaken identity truly opened my eyes as a young parent. The more time I spent with my kids as they became toddlers, and then preteens, and then teens, the more open they seemed to God's presence in their lives. The less time I spent with them, the less they seemed to pray. The observation both sobered and humbled me; somehow, in their minds, I helped shape their passion and hunger for God. I soon discovered that my own passion and hunger for God seemed just as directly related to my duties as a parent. I've been at this business of parenting for less than two decades, but I think it's fair to say I have been stretched more in these past sixteen years- spiritually, emotionally, and relationally-than perhaps in all the previous years combined. Why does parenting offer such a potent pathway to personal growth and reflection? The process of raising children requires skills that God alone possesses, and we are decidedly not God. As much as our kids maThomas, Gary L. is the author of 'Sacred Parenting How Raising Children Shapes Our Souls', published 2004 under ISBN 9780310247340 and ISBN 0310247349.