Stripped Bare The 12 Truths That Will Help You Land the Very Best Black Man

GUIDELINES FOR THE TRUTHS Are you ready to get stripped? It is time to let go of all of the misconceptions you have about black love and move into prosperous relationships that serve to feed your mind, body, and spirit. We are getting ready to call all of the news media, television shows, and women's magazines liars, because there are good black men out there who are still looking for great sisters to call their own. Our challenge is not with our men. The real challenge is reprogramming ourselves so that we can be contributors to our relationships, not detractors. The truths will revolutionize your approach to relationships. WHY HAVE THE TRUTHS? The state of relationships between brothers and sisters is on shaky ground. Everywhere you turn there are images of strong single black moms, black men with their nonblack wives, or black women hanging on to the worst possible men ever because they're afraid of being alone. If you tend to believe the media, sitcoms, and water cooler gossip, then you are probably feeling that there is little hope for finding the very best black man out there for you. Play close attention, ladies: there are many great black men out there. Do not buy into the lies that all the good men are already married or gay. These are lies sold to our community so that we don't forge strong family or personal relationships, which have statistically proven to contribute to long, secure, and prosperous lives. Further, it is my belief that sisters clothe themselves with these lies so that we can justify our inability to select quality men or end bad relationships. Our ability to have positive relationships is not completely shaped by insecure black men, our relationships with our fathers, socioeconomic conditions, or any other psychobabble that you have been sold in the past through the media and other relationship guides. These arguments do have some merit, but only you can decide to drop the negativity of the past and move forward into a better future. It is time to put the past away and live in the present--a present that is filled with new experiences and great love. The basic idea that I want you to open up your mind to today is that the very best black man is available to you. It is up to you to take the proactive steps to pursue and keep him. Welcome to the best and most practical relationship advice that you will ever receive--advice that pushes you toward action and will not leave you lying in wait for the dream brother to discover you on that back pew, in the third cubicle from the left, or in the produce aisle. What I am offering is relationship truths that work not through deep psychoanalysis or childhood revelations but through identifying proactive behaviors that make you the master of your relationship destiny. Contrary to popular belief, the very best black men are not just out there somewhere waiting to discover you. You will have to be the aggressor, taking the steps to identify, pursue, and nurture a great relationship. For all of the benefits that the truths will bring you, it is also important to note what they will not do. The truths will not: Change a bad brother into a good one Blame all of your bad relationship choices on Mommy or Daddy Tell you that there are not enough good black men out there Increase your net income, get you a Benz, or move you into a new house If you desire any of the above, then this is not the book for you. We are digging a little deeper here and trying to undo a lot of the relationship behaviors and concepts that we black women have accepted in order to justify not having the love we deserve. In the end, the truths will provide you with ideas that will empower you to consciously decide to have the very best in your life. ABlack, LaDawn is the author of 'Stripped Bare The 12 Truths That Will Help You Land the Very Best Black Man', published 2006 under ISBN 9780345483669 and ISBN 0345483669.